PURPOSESCAPING with Amanda Miller Littlejohn

PYG 124: When finishing matters more than winning

As you are on the road to package your genius, and you're a high achiever who is used to always being the best, I want you to remember:
No matter where you place
sometimes just finishing the race
is a form of winning
when you're doing something new.
 
***
If you know you have valuable gifts inside you, but you are unclear which race you're running and where's the lane for your gifts and talents, I welcome you to apply for the opportunity to get that clarity during our visibility academy where we can work on it together.
 
If you've been doing great work and getting results in your industry, but you want to expand your exposure, learn more about our PR mastermind and apply.
 
Enrollment is open now for the academy and our PR mastermind. Visit www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com to learn more and apply.

PYG 123: When you have to drop the ball...

Sometimes limits are in our heads, telling us we can't go any further when we have just a little bit of gas left in the take.
Other times limits are deeper, and our exhaustion is our body/mind/spirit's way of telling us we need to rest.
But the beautiful thing about life is, for most things, we get another day to try again. If you had to put down a work project, take a day off from cooking dinner for the family, or skipped a workout - you can get back on track. 
Don't beat yourself up if you drop the ball.
Just pick it back up tomorrow.
 
***
Here are all the ways you can work with me:
 
Join our free Facebook community where you can meet other podcast listeners and engage directly with me. Join here.
 
Check out the book Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand if you haven't read it yet.
Pick up the companion workbook - a tool I made to help you think through the questions that can help you get closer.
 
If you need help remembering how to answer the call, I'd be honored to support you this fall in Package Your Genius Academy. Visit the site to learn more and apply.
 
If you're ready for Maximum Exposure, learn more about our PR Mastermind.

PYG 122: Reframe your default

My mom retired a few years ago, and in the time since, she's been living her best life. She had a goal to see all the states in the lower 48 of USA and as of today, she's officially done it.
 
She left for a road trip for her birthday early last week, headed with her bestie from Tennessee to New England.
 
When she initially told me about the trip, I remember catching myself getting wistful. "I sure wish I could take off for ten days at my own pace to see the sights," I thought to myself. "And I sure wish I could spend that kind of quality time with my mom..."
 
I can't do that because of the kids, I immediately told myself. For the last decade plus, that has been my default reason whenever I get too excited about doing something or going somewhere that will take me away from the DC area. Because the kids have to get to and from school, my husband travels a lot for work so I need to make sure my calendar is clear.
 
But is that true, really?
 
At this point, my kids know how to catch public transportation, manage their chores, bathing themselves, and even preparing some of their own meals themselves with light oversight. Now they are still kids and therefore need emotional support, lots of refereeing, and general coaching and guidance. But for the most part, I must tell you, I have hit my stride as a mom. And with their new school the support from the school and other parents really takes the whole "I can't be away from the kids" excuse off the table.
 
But when my mom told me about her trip, it was my immediate default. Looking over the last ten days though, I totally could have joined her!
 
This made me think about defaults. Even when our situations change - often times because we've been grinding to bring on the change - our minds can lag behind.
 
It's kind of like muscle memory which I talked about on episode 99. If we have leaned on a reason for long enough, it becomes our default without us even realizing it.
 
So we end up making broad assumptions based on default decisions of our past that used to serve us. It's easier for your brain to go on autopilot - that uses up much less energy - but sometimes that autopilot needs reprogramming.
 
For example, say you have a seafood allergy as a child, so even though love lobster and crab, you avoid seafood restaurants because you know the food will make you sick. But then you go for an annual checkup as an adult only to find you've outgrown the allergy and you can now eat all the seafood you want. Now you love seafood, but even after learning that you are no longer allergic, when it comes time to plan dinner or choose a restaurant, your brain automatically removes any seafood options by default. Even though that's no longer your reality.
 
And we do it all the time. Even if you haven't outgrown an old reason like I have with my kids being why I can't travel, you may be coming up with reasons that match a mindset you held in the past that you don't hold anymore.
 
For example, I'm going to a conference in a few weeks to Richmond, Virginia. I knew what hotel I wanted to stay at so I went to their website to book a room. When I went to book my room, they didn't have my dates, so I started doing research on other hotels that fit my preferences. I started going down the rabbit hole until it dawned on me that I don't have to do this. I have an admin. Let me let her do this so I can go do something else. She's way better at that stuff anyway.
 
Now the thing with my admin is I'm pretty good about having her do things for my business - but I always forget that she can help me with some of the more personal administrative things too. Having spent my entire life doing personal administrative things myself - and having to do so much personal admin for my family - it's easy to forget that I have help. So my default in that situation was "I have to find a hotel myself..." I reframed that to "I have support."
 
For me it requires practice to reframe. What about you? What are some of your default decisions that you see yourself making?
 
Here are a few more of my defaults plus my reframe.
 
1) Default: I don't have time to write. Reframe: I've set my business and life up in a way that I have ample time to write.
 
2) Default: I have to put off large purchases for the future. Reframe: I am not just starting out. I have considerably more financial resources. I can buy it now.
 
3) Default: I can't drive to NYC on a whim. Reframe: I feel confident driving long distances on my own now. When are we leaving?
 
4) Default: I have to know all of the answers and do all the thinking work when it comes to my clients. Reframe: I have 2 other brilliant communications coaches working in my program. They have amazing ideas and strategies to share. They are here to empower my clients.
 
5) Default: I only have a few more weeks before I start my new job. Even though I had planned to do some self care, travel somewhere restorative, and rest, I will have to spend the rest of my time off moving and getting settled. Reframe: I can get help packing up my things, get this move done in a weekend, and use the rest of my time off for me.
 
So whenever you get that sense of wistfulness I described when you think I wish I could do A but i can't because of B, I want you to ask yourself...do you really?
 
Is there not another way you can accomplish what you want to accomplish? How can we remove this as a barrier to your real goal and where you really want to be putting your energy. Let's get creative.
 
***
If you know you have valuable gifts inside you, but you are unclear on all of the how - how do I figure out what to focus on, how do I describe it to people, what do I charge - you NEED to get yourself into our visibility academy where we can work on it together.
 
If you've been doing great work and getting results in your industry, but you want to expand your exposure, learn more about our PR mastermind and apply.
 
Enrollment is open now for the academy and our PR mastermind. Visit www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com to learn more and apply.
 

PYG 121: Op Ed Writing to Spread Your Ideas

We've been talking a lot about purpose, but I want to change the conversation and switch gears back to visibility because it's one of the reasons you're here.
In this two-part episode on op-ed writing, I share 5 questions to ask yourself to get closer to the op-ed you want to write.
In part two, we'll talk to a journalist who will share how we can reach millions of people with our words.
 
 

PYG 120: Someone needs to hear it from YOU

Do you remember your favorite teacher from when you were in school? Or a teacher who could make a subject you usually didn't like come alive? Or better yet, a teacher who could break down a subject in a way that could make you understand even when others couldn't?
 
And they may have been saying the exact same thing or reading from the exact same textbook as all the other teachers who taught that subject, but for whatever reason you could just hear it better from them?
 
Well someone out there is thinking the exact same thing about you.
 
Someone out there needs to hear your area of expertise, but they need to hear it from you.
 
Even though there are already people who are saying some version of what you're saying, or doing some version of what you're doing, there are still people out there who still need to get the goods from you.
 
Why is that?
 
I can't explain it. Just like you can't explain how two cooks can follow the same recipe but turn out completely different dishes. Even though both taste good, one is crispier and you like it that way. But then if you ask someone else, they prefer it less crispy. It's all a matter of preference.
 
But my point is, you are someone's preference.
 
Someone prefers YOU.
 
That's a part of why you have to package your genius - aside from the fact that it will call you until you answer it as I've said before.
 
But if you're one of those people who gets so caught up in what other people are doing, or the fact that the market is saturated, or there are so many coaches in this space, or there's already five other books out on my topic there's no point in me even getting in the game - you're hurting yourself because you're not expressing what you need to express, and you're hurting the people who need to hear it from you.
 
Now. There may be thousands of people who claim to do what you do, serve how you serve, support others how you support others.
 
But they aren't you.
 
They don't have your spirit. They don't have your story. They don't have your energy. They don't have your humor. They don't have your journey. They aren't from your hometown. They don't have whatever it is that gives you the power to connect with someone who may find themself on a similar path.
 
They aren't going to say it the way you'd say it.
 
They won't write it the way you'd write it.
 
They won't use the same analogies and metaphors.
 
And because they aren't you, your people may SEE the others in your field, but they won't be able to HEAR them.
 
It's about connection. It's about bringing your you-ness to the table so others can connect with what they need in you, and you can connect with what you need in them.
 
When you can truly understand this, you can stop wasting your time getting frustrated with why you can't land corporate clients but he seems to attract all the corporate clients. Or why the same people who read her book aren't flocking to read yours.
 
And another thing, I'll leave you with: you have to understand that some people have "mass appeal". Others are for a more discerning palate.
 
Both are great, both are necessary. Neither is better than the other. They're just different. Remember - it's a matter of preference.
 
So whether you find yourself in the category of being for the masses or being for the more discerning - it doesn't matter. Either way, you're for who you're for. Don't discount a smaller audience that may have a deeper connection to your work if you like to go deep.
 
Don't get discouraged when the masses seem to respond to someone who is saying a version of what you said six months ago, but they didn't want to hear it from you. You have to understand, they couldn't hear it from you. Who needed to hear it from you heard it, but those that couldn't hear it aren't your people. Your people caught it, digested it, and are waiting on your next insight, your next big idea, your next aha moment.
 
We have to learn to trust - and release comparison which I know is difficult to do in the age of social media - but we have to learn to trust that what we have to share is of value and can set someone else free if we give ourselves permission to give ourselves away.
 
Will you give yourself permission to give yourself away?
 
I sure hope so. It's so much more fun when you do, trust me.
 
If you're new to the podcast, I welcome you for coming on this journey with me. Don't forget to rate and review the show wherever you listen so we can reach more people like us.
 
I'm super excited to be hosting an opinion page editor for the New York Times for our Maximum Exposure PR mastermind this week. In addition to meeting with the mastermind students in our closed session, she's also agreed to answer a few questions for the podcast. I'm so excited.
 
If you have ever wanted to know what it takes to get your ideas published by a major outlet like the New York Times, email me your questions so I can ask her on the podcast. You can email your questions about op ed publishing to support (at) packageyourgeniusacademy (dot) com and I'll be sure to cover those when we do our interview.
 
***
 
Enrollment is open for the second cohort and we're getting excited. For our first cohort, we've landed media mentions in the Washington Post, WJLA, ABC, NBC, Fast Company, Washington Post Express, Fox, News Channel 8 in Washington, DC and more.
 
If you want to learn more about the ME program and how we help our students brainstorm story ideas, craft timely pitches and contact the media each month, visit the website and learn more and apply.
 
In closing, I hope what you've heard here today will set you free. I hope I've inspired you to stop over thinking it and finally package your genius.
 
Because someone needs to hear it from you.

PYG 119: Change your personal culture

I recently attended an organizational effectiveness training retreat for an organization I'm a member of. One of the most powerful things I learned was how easily an organization's culture can get off track, and how possible it is to get things BACK on track.
 
So think about an organization you're a part of, or even a relationship you have with someone to make it easier to imagine. If you have one bad interaction with someone, you may say "Oh we had a tiff," or "we didn't see eye to eye..." and you chalk it up to a misunderstanding, but the relationship isn't over.
 
If you have two or three bad encounters, internally you go on alert. You may start to rethink the relationship and even say "We're not in a good place..." But once you get into the four-five range with negative encounters, you're in the red zone. In the training, our facilitator said that 5x is a DECISION that this is how we will deal with each other. This is our culture.
 
But what I find fascinating is the same way you can make a decision to not check an organization's culture, and just let it be toxic, you can also make a decision to be positive.
 
You can make a decision to fix things.
 
You can make a decision to change.
 
And if you can make five steps in a positive direction, you can start the process of reversing the negativity. You can decide the culture will be good.
 
Your relationship with yourself is the same way. You can make a decide with your actions to change your personal culture.
 
So if you haven't been prioritizing your calling, or making time to package your genius, let's change your personal culture.
 
To make this practical, I want to know what's on your calendar this week? If you're ready to prioritize your goals, where are you fitting that on your upcoming agenda? Where are you making space?
 
What step can you make this week to change your personal culture?
 
For me, I'm really to bring some intention to my new morning drop-off routine. My kids' new school is near some of my favorite hiking trails, so I'm excited to build some hiking, thinking and writing time into my weekday agenda.
 
As I've mentioned before, daily thinking and writing time really helps me feel centered and pays off in every area of my life from my business, to my creative writing, to my marriage, to my parenting. So it's silly to not do what I know works for me.
 
I'm changing my personal culture. I'm making what I know works for me a priority. This way I'm being intentional. I'm not letting my life happen to me by default. I'm not wondering why I'm no closer to my goals than I was last time I checked.
 
 
***
If you know you have valuable gifts inside you, but you are unclear on all of the how - how do I figure out what to focus on, how do I describe it to people, what do I charge - you NEED to get yourself into our visibility academy where we can work on it together.
 
If you've been doing great work and getting results in your industry, but you want to expand your exposure, learn more about our PR mastermind and apply.
 
Enrollment is open now for the academy and our PR mastermind. Visit www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com to learn more and apply.
 

PYG 118: Your martyrdom is no excuse

Harlem
BY LANGSTON HUGHES
 
 
What happens to a dream deferred?
 
      Does it dry up
      like a raisin in the sun?
      Or fester like a sore—
      And then run?
      Does it stink like rotten meat?
      Or crust and sugar over—
      like a syrupy sweet?
 
      Maybe it just sags
      like a heavy load.
 
      Or does it explode?
 
 

PYG 117: How you show up when you want to WIN

How do you show up when you come to win?
 
For some reason, we all know how to prioritize our work assignments, our money, our kids, even our health - but when we think of our gifts we go blank.
 
We get ourselves out of bed and out of the house every day, but suddenly can't figure out how to motivate ourselves to get started.
 
We multitask, manage multiple calendars and juggle conflicting schedules for our teams and families, but we can't figure out how to find the time to make our dreams happen.
 
We put together scrum boards and complex project flowcharts, but when it comes to our gifts, we can't figure out the first step to take.
 
But we need to attack our gifts with the same energy we bring to the places we already excel.
 
Look at what you're doing well, where you're winning, what you're getting right.
 
What are your typical patterns?
 
How do you show up when you're ready to win?
 
For example, one of the things I feel like I am getting right is cultivating my children. So when I look at how I move and the energy I bring to cultivating my kids, I notice I do a few things every single year.
 
I do a few things:
 
1. Challenge the kids and raise the bar and keep standards high. So often we limit ourselves so I try to push them further than they think they can go so they can understand their own capabilities and learn not to limit themselves.
 
2. I cultivate them regularly. I try to find seasonal activities - classes, camps, lessons for them to take and try. I want them to get used to doing and trying new things. I want them to get accustomed to being engaged individuals who are connected to their personal talents and their larger society.
 
3. I personally keep learning -  I seek out books, articles, podcasts and other ways to learn how to be a better parent and guide.
 
4. I find partners who can help me take them to the next level. I know I don't know everything, so I look for teachers and instructors who can inspire them and mentor them generally or around a specific focus area.
 
This is how I show up when I come to win. And because these are my kids and I only get one shot at raising them, showing up to win is non-negotiable. And as such, it's become second nature to me. And because it's second nature to me, I see it as proof that I can build a success strategy for any domain of my life.
 
As can you.
 
If you are successful in any area of your life, which I know you are as a high achiever who listens to this podcast, you have the power to dissect your own personal recipe for success.
 
When you show up to win, how do you move?
When you show up to win, what is your formula to get results? When you show up to win, how do you motivate yourself to get things done?
When you show up to win, how do you organize your time?
When you show up to win, how do you find the money to invest when you need more resources?
 
So with that solutions-oriented, strategic mind, I want you to think through how you can approach your gifts, your calling.
 
Don't just use your organizational skills, your strategic mind, your resourcefulness and creativity to accomplish your tasks at work - use those skills to get your own stuff done, too!
 
You've got to figure out how to show up FOR YOU the same way you show up for your job or your clients.
 
When it comes to you, you've got to figure out how to show up to win.

PYG 116: Callings call

Why does it even matter whether or not you package your genius?
 
Who cares if you explore what you're meant to do?
 
What difference does it make if you don't share your genius with others?
 
Those are the questions I want to explore with you today. Because before I can make the case that you should package your genius, you should first understand what's at stake if you don't.
 
I believe the mandate of being human - what's written in our genetic code or whatever makes us homo sapiens vs some other species - is to find what we were put on this Earth to do. Your mandate as a human is to fulfill the assignment and complete the mission for your specific journey, your specific life.
 
That is what I whole-heartedly believe.
 
But if we're honest with ourselves, our life missions have likely been evident since childhood or adolescence. We've heard the call. But how many of us answered and chose to walk down the path our calling was leading us to?
 
I can remember being a student in middle school and then again in high school. I loved my English classes. My classmates and teachers were all convinced that one day I'd be a famous, important writer whose words would touch millions of people.
 
Somewhere along the way, I bought into the idea of "the starving artist" and decided I couldn't be a successful writer without starving first. So while I always knew that I was sent here to write, for years I didn't do it.
 
Can I tell you, that despite my successes as a PR person and a coach, until I finally sat down and wrote Package Your Genius I didn't feel at home in my success? There was always this lingering static - I can't quite describe it - but it was like a cloud hanging over me. And it was as if the cloud was saying "I mean, this is nice and everything...but when are you going to write your book????" As if nothing else I'd done mattered for real.
 
And then once I got that book out there, just like that, the dissonance cleared. The cloud passed.
 
Now, I will be honest. The dissonance is definitely back. But this time I'm crystal clear on why. I know I have more books to write. I know I have more messages to leave this planet while I still have an Earthly vessel that can help me accomplish what I'm here to do in this realm.
 
Callings call.
 
So expect it to feel a little uncomfortable when you're not picking up the phone.
 
It's like that feeling that you forgot to do something important, but you can't quite put your finger on what that something is. Or when you make out your list for the store, and you go and you shop, but you know there's something you forgot - even though you got every single thing on the list - something is still missing?
 
It's like that.
 
And answering the call is the opposite. Instead, it's the feeling of a stocked pantry, or of all the bills being paid, or all the doctor's appointments scheduled - the feeling that nothing is falling through the cracks.
 
But when you willingly deny yourself the opportunity to answer the call or, to use my term, "package your genius" you create an internal sense of restlessness that will haunt you.
 
And that restlessness will continue to haunt you until you honor - in some way - what you were put here to do.
 
Restless.
Unsettled.
Uneasy.
 
Until you pick up, you may not be able to put your finger on it, but you'll always get the sense that SOMETHING is missing.
 
 
***
 
Got dissonance? I would love to help you clear it.
Check out Package Your Genius if you haven't read it yet.
Pick up the companion workbook - a tool I made to help you think through the questions that can help you get closer.
 
If you need help remembering how to answer the call, I'd be honored to support you this fall in Package Your Genius Academy. Visit the site to learn more and apply.
 
 

PYG 115: Don't waste your raw materials

If I handed you the deed to the land that contained a diamond mine, how would you feel? Maybe you'd feel excited thinking about your good fortune and your riches, but after you thought about it, would you know what to do with it? Would not knowing overwhelm you? Would it make you walk away?
 
No way.
 
You'd do some research, call an expert, and figure out what one does with a valuable diamond mine. You'd figure out who has the equipment to extract the diamond, which people had the expertise to get it out, what the process is to get it up to commercial standards, and who the best buyers are for your specific type of diamond.
 
You wouldn't throw up your hands and walk away just because you don't have the technical know-how to get these diamonds out of the ground, when you know they're valuable and people want them.
 
But that's exactly what most of us are doing with our gifts.
 
We've all got raw materials, but the problem is we don't know how to refine what we have, we don't have the equipment to extract it, and we're unfamiliar with the process of bringing our raw materials to market.
 
So we make excuses for not taking the first step.
We proclaim to be too busy, but when we find ourselves with extra time, we don't do it.
We say we don't know how to get started, as if that's a good excuse.
We console ourselves with stories - we're not business-minded, we're not great with computers, we're terrible salespeople, we're bad with software.
 
But no one who is business minded, great with computers, great at sales or software was as good as they are today on the first day they tried it. And most people figure out what they need to know - just enough of what they need to know - in order to get the train moving.
 
Which is what you need to do.
 
It's what I need to do, because I'm guilty too.
 
The days keep passing. The weeks, months, and years are all adding up, and it's not getting any easier to be a beginner.
 
So today's as good a day as any to start. Think of a small way to get started - a small way to tackle what mentally feels like a bigger task than it likely is.
 
For me, it's the book about how parents and teachers can use my work to support the talents of kids. I've had this book concept on my mind and heart for over a year, so practically, how can I make it happen?
 
First, I can make a top level outline of my chapters, which I've done.
Next, I can outline my subtopics for each chapter which I've yet to do.
Then I can write a subtopic each week until they're all done.
 
Easy.
 
Notice that I didn't get into the weeds of how I'll manage structuring the book, getting it edited, published and marketed yet because all of that is irrelevant right now. I need to create some momentum first so I can feel what it's like to be moving in this direction. I need to get some small personal wins first and prove to myself that I can finish it before I even need to clutter my mind with more to dos.
 
But this is what most of us do. We get so overwhelmed thinking about the book marketing that we don't even take the time to get still and write. Or we think about where we'll find office space before we have a stable block of customers. We're worrying about things too far in the distance instead of doing what we can do now.
 
So do what you can do.
 
If you've been saying you're writing a book, make an outline and write a few chapters.
 
If you've been saying you want to start a business, land yourself a handful of clients and get into a rhythm to see how you like it. Business may not even be for you. But you'll never know until you have a taste of it.
 
If you've been talking about starting a podcast, record three episodes then figure out the rest. Trust me, all of it is a mere google search away.
 
Don't be afraid of being a beginner. But don't you dare walk away from a diamond mine because you don't know how to extract the gems out of the ground.
 
Don't be afraid to do a little on how to make your dream happen. Think of the payoff.
 
***
 
Mining and refining raw materials is what I do. It's my passion to help you extract the gleaming gems that I know are inside of you and help get them ready for the marketplace.
 
If you know you have valuable gifts inside you, but you are unclear on all of the how - how do I figure out what to focus on, how do I describe it to people, what do I charge - you NEED to get yourself into our visibility academy where we can work on it together.
 
Enrollment is open now for the academy and our PR mastermind. Visit www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com to learn more and apply.